JAN STEWER'S DEVONSHIRE BOOK

[FIRST AND SECOND EDITIONS OF "JAN STEWER'S DEMSHURE BUKE"]


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EDWARD I.—LONGSHANKS.
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Tha vurst king whu wiz carled be tha name ’o Edward, lived long about o’ zix-’underd year agone. ’Cuse, ’e’s dade now, an’ ’e wiz sitch a long-lig-ed to-ad that vokes carled’n Long- shanks.

“They didden carl’n zo tu ees vaace did ’em?” axed Tom.

“I doan’ s’pose they did tu ees vaace,” zes passon; “ twiz ony a name they gid’n vor a gite.”

Wull tho passon toad us, whane ees vather died, thees yer Edward wiz ’way auvor ’bout Jerusalem zumwheres vitin’ way tha scribes an' varisees I s’pose ’twaz, though I baint quite zure about that, but ’e waz vitin’ be-as-twill, an’ cuse ’e kommed ’ome.

But ’e wadden een a tremenyus ’urry zame as yu or I shid be, eef us wiz gwain tu be king do-e-zee. Wance ’e wiz moas’ killed, vir a chap sticked a poison knive een tha arm o’n; but Edward up way a vute-stule an’ hat tha toad scat! long the vlure; an’ tho ees wive sucked out tha poizon vrom tha wownd. Brave maid I carls ’er waz.

Wull, thees yer Edward wiz a turrable to-ad vor vitin’; an’ ’e nivver wadden zo komferable as whane ’e wiz hattin’ of tha bade o’ zum chap or nuther way ees axe.

In they days thea Welsh vokes wadden under tha zame guvcrment as wat tha English waz; neet wadden tha Scotch nuther. Zo Edward thort ’e wid go vitin’ a bit an’ zee eef ’e cude’n make tha English masters auver theese yer places do-e-zee. Zo ’e called up tha resarves an’ the volunteers, an’ zot out vore the place whur tha Welsh vokes lived tu.

Vrom wat I can make out o’t, een thiky peart o’ tha wurdle thurs a brave lot ’o mountains zure nuff; wiss than they be een Demshur. Tha chief o’ thees Welsh voke wiz a chap name o’— dalled eef I ant clane vorgot the name o’n, but I knaws passon zed it beginned way tu L’s.

Wull thees yer chap, Whane ’e zid Edward kommin’ way ees men, ’e urned up eentu tha mountains an’ ’ide away, an’ the English sojers cude’n kom vore tu whur ’e waz tu, ’cause tha Welsh wiz pin tap do-e-zee, an’ cude let down gurt rocks pin tap o’m.

Zo wat did Edward do but make aul ’ees sojers zit down aul around tha ’eels, an’ keep thea poor to-ads vrom gettin’ ort tu ate.

Zo tu last the chap way the two L’s wiz forced tu kom down an’ Edward ketched un holt.

Pore to-ad. They hat off tha hade o’ un, an’ stick’en up pin tha get o’ tha Tower of Linnon, vor vokes tu lukee tu. Zo that wiz tha end o’ ’e; or at anyrate I never yeered o’ much that 'e do-d arterwads wunts.

Wull, tho, Edward ’e beginned tu zee eef ’e cude-n du zummat tu make izzel king auver Scotland as well. Vurst proj~eck ’e tried wiz tu mar-ry ees zon tu a little maid whu wiz tu be Quane o’ Scotland whane ’er grawed up.

But ’er tuke an’ died an’ upzot aul o’t, zo thur wiz tha een’ tu thiky job.

But Edward knawed uther ways o’ killin’ a cat bezides lockin’ o’un up een dairy.

Thur wiz tu chaps wan carled Bruce an’ tuther Bailey, an’ they both zed they ’ad bes’ right tu be king of Scotland. Zo thay dezided thay wid ax Edward tu zettle et vor’m an’ zay whichee shid be king. Edward zed Bailey shid be king, eef ’e wid ’low that Edward waz ees maister, an’ gi’ un ’eaps ’o land an’ money an’ aul zorts o’t; an’ Bailey zed ’e wid, an’ Edward zed ’e ’ad bes’ right tu be king.

Zo then, cuse, Bruce ’e got vinnid like, an’ zot up no eendo’ a scummer, an’ arter ’e, a chap name o’ Walliss car-ried et on.

But arter a bit Edward ketched ’olt tu Walliss an’ hat off tha ’ade o’n, cuse, an’ ’ad tha body o’n cut aul abrooad.

Wull tho, anuther chap name o’ Bruce, zon tu ’tuther wan I menshined a bit agone, ’e tried on tha zame caper, an’ ’eed away up een tha mountains zame as thik chap way tha tu L’s.

Edward wiz getting up-along be thees time an’ most past vitin’ but he made tha vokes car-ry un right vore tu Scotland arter thees chap. But twiz a goodish bit vor a chapo’ ees age tu undertake an’ ’e died pin tha ro-ad; zo ’e wiz vorce tu ztap ’vore ’e got thur.

Owszoever no-body never hat off ees ’ade.

That’s aul I can mind ’bout Longshanks ’cept that ’e draved out aul tha Jews vrim thee: kontry.

But I reckon they’ve kom back, mos’ peart o’m.



JAN STEWER'S DEVONSHIRE BOOK

[THIRD EDITION OF "JAN STEWER'S DEMSHURE BUKE"]


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There is no equivalent in the third edition to "Edward I--Longshanks"